Life Lessons

So, I have an unexpected day off from work. No, I didn't get laid off. Veteran's Day is a paid holiday for one of the unions, so the Project Managers closed the jobsite for the day. Unfortunately, it is not a paid holiday for me. But, I shall revel in the quiet, and the chance to rest, and do a few things that I don't get to normally do during the week. Working 7-5:30 5 days a week makes it hard to take care of business at places that are open from 8-5. I think I'm going to lunch with my friend Bobi, stopping by church for a bit, and basically puttering. It's a good thing that I don't have to work today. Tomorrow I will probably just live at the bowling alley. Kat has regular league bowling at 11, then a Junior/Adult tournament at 5. One of my co-workers is bowling with her. They are both excited for this.

So, for right now, I am not able to work overtime. I have worked overtime since I started this job in August 2010. It is a huge financial hit, but instead of freaking out, I am strategizing, thinking, budgeting, and pretty much okay with it. This is only temporary, and as soon as the customer gives the okay, life will go back to normal. Whatever that is. Christmas may be sparse this year, but for my family it's not about the presents, it's about family. Especially this year with Tori being in Portland. By the way, she will be home in a month!!! WOOT!!!!

In other news, since Kat's IEP (Individual Education Plan) was cancelled last November for her dyslexia, she has struggled a lot with her classes. Unfortunately, most of her teachers think she is cured. You know, because her dyslexia is like the flu. Maybe a little more like diabetes. Anyway, we have been fretting a bit, because the State of Idaho requires her to pass standardized tests to graduate. Thank you, No Child Left Behind (I won't expand on my thoughts on this, that is a rant for another time). Right now, she can't pass without accommodations due to her dyslexia. I was told that she can take a path to get an "Alternate Diploma." Basically a patronizing pat on the head to say, "you tried your best, and this is not a real diploma, but it's close." I found out last night that Idaho has no Alternate Diploma. The School district is required to offer a student that will not pass the ISATS an alternate path to prove that they have mastered the skills necessary to graduate. If they pass the alternate path, they get a diploma. A REAL diploma. *HUGE SIGH OF RELIEF!* I am still going to try to get her help to pass the ISATS, but it's nice to know that she can still graduate.

So that's my update for now. continue to pray for my finances, for Tori to find a job, for Kat to do well in school, and for Sammee to graduate in May. Thank you all for reading my blog and for supporting me. And a special thank you to all the people who have served and are still serving our country. Your sacrifice is what keeps us free!

The Not So Weekly Update

So once again I am a blog slacker. Last weekend ended up being full of phone calls and updates from Tori regarding her grandparents' visit to Portland. Then my standard week happened. 10 hour work days, homework with Kat at night, and bowling on Saturday. Which leads us back to Sunday. Oh yeah, that's today. Today was laundry. That's about it.

So here is the latest Wortham news. Kat is doing a Junior/Adult tournament next weekend here in Poky. She really wanted me to bowl with her, but that would have been very bad. One of my co-workers, Larry, bowls on at least 3 leagues here in town, and jumped at the chance to bowl with Kat. This should be a lot of fun. They bowl at 5 pm on Saturday and 1 pm on Sunday.

Tori is definitely going to Denver for Thanksgiving. I am very excited for her on this journey. First, she has only flown twice, and both times with Sammee. I should write a note for the person who sits next to her, telling them that she is a nervous person, but is very sweet and might just need her hand held. Just kidding, she will be fine. And, she will get to see her Aunt CoCo while she is there, and maybe even her Granny Byrd. It was very generous of her dad and his wife to extend this invitation. I can hardly wait to hear the adventures.

Speaking of Tori, she will be coming home one month from Tuesday! YAY! Pocatello sure has been quieter and less random without her. No one else has random dance parties in the frozen food section of Fred Meyer. I may have to force her to hold a dance party or maybe even organize a flash mob while she's home. and, she will be home for a whole month!

And, my jobsite is probably closing down completely the week between Christmas and New Year's. Less money in my pocket, but more time with my girls and parents. WOOT!

So that is my sorta weekly update. I will post more after Kat's tourney next weekend. The way she bowls and her passion for the sport, who knows, maybe she will go pro and be the child who takes care of her mom in her old age. Hah!

Another Week in the Books

So we have had a rather uneventful week. Still juggling finances, but getting better slowly but surely. Within a few weeks all should be better.

Kat's average in bowling is currently 131, which is 30 pins better than last season. She will transfer to Century High School just in time to be on Century's bowling team. She just adores Century's bowling coach. And, he's a good coach. I hope her move to Century is good for her.

Tori is doing very well at school and loves her classes. She has started a video blog, and I just love all of her updates. She has also started selling her crocheted items to earn extra money, and has people interested in learning to crochet, so she may start teaching for a fee. Maybe she isn't supposed to have a traditional job, but earn money doing what she loves. Still such a proud mama. Mom and dad are leaving on Monday for Portland for an antique show. They will check in on Tori while the are there and take her some stuff she needs.

Sammee closed ISU's Fall play last weekend. Right now she is helping with a Haunted Asylum put on by a local theatre. It's funny, she doesn't like scary stuff, but loves scaring others. And when the ISU Theatre department puts on a Haunted house for Halloween, it is some of the scariest stuff I have seen. And these kids love getting ugly and gory and being creepy. And drama geeks set a theme and make it as spooky as possible. And, all the money goes to scholarships. If you are local and want to go, hunt me down and I will give you directions to OTAS in Old Town.

Work is still going well. Nothing new on that front. Working 50 hours a week. Keeping busy. Still love the people I work with.

So that is the weekly update. I think these are starting to sound the same. Trying to decide if I should wait to post again only if something interesting happens. But, if I do that, there will be some sort of drama. I don't want drama.

Weekly update

So this week has been relatively uneventful. Getting back on track financially, Kat's slogging through school, and Tori is still jobless but doing well.

Tori and I had a nice, long telephone chat last night. She caught me up on the happenings in her life, how classes are going, etc. She has actually started selling her hats (YAY) and other crafty things. She is getting involved in student government, and even found a community choir that she can join in January.

She told me one thing that I am still processing. Her dad and stepmother have contacted her and even sent her a care package. They are Facebook friends, and communicate regularly. I am happy that my ex has finally realized what he has been missing all these years, but I hope Tori keeps her guard up also. There have been some mean things said about me in the past, and I just hope that they are trying to form a relationship with her honestly. I know, I should be happy, but I have no choice but to be skeptical and a bit wary. But, Tori has a good head on her shoulders, and I trust her to make the right decisions.

Today she is trying out a new church, which is right by her apartment. Hope she finds a church family soon.

Well, I'm gearing up for another busy week at work. Mom will be home from Nampa tomorrow, so transportation for Kat won't be an issue for a while. And, Mom and Dad will go to Portland at the end of the month. Gotta get some stuff together to send to Tori with them.

So that's my story for this week.

Quick Update

So there have been a couple of new things that happened since the trial on Wednesday. One thing I forgot to mention is that it was stated in the petition that if I fought the lawsuit I would have to pay all attorney fees and court costs. That worried me, but I figured if I had to pay it, it would be at $5.00 per month. Not gonna go into debt or get behind on bills just because of my ex's stupid attorney. Got all of the legal paperwork in the mail on Thursday, and, at the bottom, just above the judge's signature, was this sentence. "Each party will be responsible for their own fees and expenses related to this case." Which means, simply, that he has to pay his attorney, all court costs, and his airfare to come down here. I paid a total of $58 to file the answer. Any time I missed at work I made up by going in early and staying late. I may have lost my case, but I feel like a winner (not Charlie Sheen winning) in this matter.

And, I have reworked my budget, and I really don't need that money. This week will be rough because Tori needed money for her new apartment and now I am completely strapped until Friday. But, next week's budget is in the books, and Kat and I are getting set to tighten our belts a little and make it work. And the raise won't hurt. It will cover about half of what was lost in child support.

So I am doing better, with no hard feelings or bitterness. No more angst about money. Feeling a lot less stressed about life. Now to concentrate on getting Kat through high school. Oy!

It's Over!

I will start out by apologizing in advance. This post may ramble, jump around, and be generally babbling. But, i am just going to spew my feelings tonight.

My lawsuit is done. And, I lost. My Child Support case has been cancelled. But, it's over. I can get back to normal (whatever counts as normal in my household). Here's what happened.

First of all, my whole defense was that the State required a DNA test to contest paternity, so why hasn't he done that? I even had a letter from Child Support Enforcement stating that.

So we get into court and his attorney questioned me, then questioned him (yes, he was there). The attorney got a few things wrong though. He claimed that at one time I claimed that Kat was his child. I did rebut that. Then a couple more things, and the judge made his ruling strictly based on what we said. The one good thing is that the attorney wanted me to repay all child support paid since the petition was filed, which was May. The judge denied that motion. I am not liable for any child support he has paid for Kat over the last 12+ years. Whew. I am just glad that it is over. I no longer have to deal with him in any capacity.

My only worry right now is that my income just decreased by over $400 per month. I have 2 kids in college, and one in braces, which the child support was paying for. Luckily for me, I have a good job, and, got a raise today. Which had very little to do with court. I guess it had been in the works for a couple of weeks.

So I survived a trial, seeing my ex for the first time in 15 years, and a financial downfall. And I will be okay. Sammee will be okay. Tori will be okay. And even Kat will be okay.

I haven't even really cried today. I haven't really cried for a long time. Not because I'm tough, but because I won't let myself. Maybe this weekend I will rent one of my favorite crying movies and just let go. Yeah, an evening with Terms of Endearment or Steel Magnolias might be the best prescription for me. In the meantime, I shall be Super Mom, Super Time Nazi, and Super Andrea.

If you have any questions, either Facebook me or toss me an email. wortandr@gmail.com. I'm sure I left something out.

Until next time.

Court

So we go to trial on Wednesday, October 5. Not sure what to expect. I have only been to court once before, and that was my divorce hearing 15 years ago. No lawyers involved. And, my ex didn't even show up. So here's what I know.

I found lots of evidence to help my case. But, my ex's attorney is trying to sway it his way. Gotta work on that. I will have one more piece of evidence and hopefully it will help. Fingers crossed and prayers appreciated.

I guess Mom will be back in time for the trial. That will help my nerves a lot. Plus, I think my friend Karl will be there also. Simply moral support from both of them. Very much needed. I will post the outcome on Wednesday evening. I just hope the trial isn't too long. I hate being away from work.

Now on to Tori. She had a great first week of school. She seems to love her classes, and is meeting people. On Monday, she has 2 job interviews. Both on campus. One work study job and one job-job. Hopefully she can work both of them if offered the jobs. And, she found a different apartment closer to school. Hope she gets it and can get moved.

Okay, that's my story so far. The end of the law suit story on Wednesday.